Summer

Ever since my preschool teacher gig ended the last week of May, I've had a lot of extra time off.  Even with two (actually, due to some boring stuff I don't want to go into, it's now officially THREE) other jobs apart from the preschool thing, I can't seem to get enough hours to fully occupy my time.  And I know that when schools get out around here, I'm going to have to devote full days instead of full afternoons to my nanny job--but in the meantime, I have a lot more time to do absolutely nothing.

Now, if this time had been handed to me back in January or February, I know exactly what I would do with it.  I'd work on writing stuff until my fingers fell off.  Since I kind of like my fingers attached to my hands, I guess it's a good thing that I didn't have a lot of free time then.

The thing is, there's something about the summer that makes me feel...well, I can't think of a word for it.  Lazy was the first word that came to my mind, but that's not what I'm looking for.  I mean, I can be lazy (yesterday was an example of how I can unforgivably waste a lot of time playing computer games when I'm supposed to be working on writing--and I hope never to repeat it--but something tells me I will).  But I think a better term to describe how summer makes me feel is...relaxed.

I blame it on the fact that I spent my entire childhood going to school for every season besides summer.  When summer came, no more work.  I got to sleep in late and watch tv and read books and play outside and go swimming and go on vacation and just do nothing until August.  And my parents are teachers, so they had summer off, too.  I had no concept of people actually having to WORK in the summer.  And I guess even now part of that mentality is still present.

Sometimes I get really worked up and think I have to do a lot of stuff--and work is important.  The things I do with the time I've been given are vitally important.  But sometimes I start thinking that if I'm not doing this one certain thing (like writing, going to work, etc.), then I'm wasting my time.  And summer is a nice reminder that it's okay to relax.  It's a reminder I need annually.

Last summer I decided that I was going to try to experience every season instead of just getting through them.  With summer, that meant I was going to spend more time doing relaxing things that were still important.  I went on daycations to see friends that live a few hours away.  I sat out on my front porch with a glass of iced tea--just to listen to the sounds of the crickets.  I put on my spf 100 and went to the pool.  I made low calorie root beer floats.  In the fall, I made a point of actually going to the state fair (since it's so close and I'd NEVER been before--what was I thinking?).  I carved a pumpkin.  I made a full Thanksgiving dinner (complete with a 13 lb. turkey) just for myself (even though one other person did show up at the last minute).  Winter was harder because I'm one of those notorious WINTER HATERS, but even then I tried.  I mean, Christmas is easy.  It's my favorite season, my favorite day, my favorite favorite favorite.  But after Christmas, then comes that two and a half month period where I hate everything...except for hot chocolate (which I couldn't have because I'm dieting, but oh well).  But I did a lot of knitting (because that's a winter activity, yo).  I got a new coat which helped things a lot--it's always better to brave the cold when looking adorable and fashionable...and because of all the knitting, I also had a lot of cute scarves to wear.  Mainly, I kept telling myself that spring would be all the sweeter after I finally got through winter.  Then spring came and my heart rejoiced!  Life!  Flowers!  Butterflies!  Warmer (but not too warm) weather!  Allergies...well, okay, so spring isn't perfect either, but that's what Claritin is for.

So it's summer again (or so the temperatures outside tell me, even if the calendar still says it's spring).  And I'm learning (once again) that it's okay to relax.  I've had a lot of time off.  Some of it I've wasted.  Some of it I've spent LIVING.  Even if I'm not working or writing, I can still do something important--like go have lunch with a friend I haven't seen in a while or having a picnic just because I can.

I really think that one of the reasons God invented summer is to remind us to slow down and take time to relax.  I get in such a hurry sometimes to do do do, get done get done get done, be somewhere be somewhere be somewhere that I forget it's important to take time to breathe.  God did give us work, but He also gave us rest.  And sometimes rest means doing something different from the treadmill/hamster wheel routine.  Sometimes it just means taking the time to appreciate life.

So whatever else happens this summer, I plan on really living.

Work and Worship Part 2

Sometimes I think I've said all I have to say on a subject, and then I realize that I didn't say all I wanted to. This is one of those times.

In my Bible study class on Sunday morning, we were reading from Ephesians 2:1-10. This is one of my favorite passages, but I'm weird. A lot of Christians I know read this passage and really set their focus on the verses that deal with grace and being alive in Christ. I get that. I really do. This whole passage is so amazing. All the verses are so important and tie together well. God inspired Paul to write them and they're incredible words of truth. But I'm weird, as I mentioned before. The verses that stand out to me are not the same ones that seem to stand out to everyone else.

My favorite verse from this passage is verse 10: "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." In verse 3 of this passage, Paul refers to his readers (the Ephesians, as well as all Christians) as formerly being "by nature OBJECTS of wrath." I like the contrast this plays with verse 10. We go from being objects of wrath to God's workmanships--other translations state we are "God's masterpieces." That's through God's grace. I love the way some translations word this whole passage. In the first few verses, Paul talks about how we were once dead in our sin and gratifying our own sinful desires--we were objects of wrath. Then in verse four comes the turning point: BUT GOD made us alive in Christ. I love those words. "BUT GOD." Those words are full of such hope and promise. Mmm. I get cold chills thinking about it. It really is only by His grace that we can be or do anything.

That brings me to my point. Maybe. I tend to ramble, haven't you noticed? I'll bet you have. AHEM.

In verse 9, Paul reemphasizes that it's only by grace that we are saved, alive, etc. He points out that it is NOT BY OUR WORKS so that we can't boast about it.

And then in the very next verse, verse 10 (see above), Paul states that God gave us work to do. Hold up. Didn't he JUST say in the previous verse that our works are basically meaningless in regards to our salvation? It's not a contradiction. It's a clarification.

Works don't save us. I could write brilliant novels and lovingly take care of children and mow lawns for the elderly and make gourmet meals for the homeless or do any number of things that would qualify as work. They wouldn't do a thing for me. The thing is, though, that God did make work. According to Eph. 2:10, he prepared work for us to do.

Work doesn't save us, but it glorifies Him. I don't *think* that I'm counting on all the work I do to save me, but I think every Christian from time to time finds him/herself in that trap of wanting to "do things for God." God doesn't need us to do things for Him. God doesn't need anything.

God desires us. He chooses us. He uses us because He is good, not because there's anything good in us. The work He's given you and me doesn't have anything to do with saving us. It's what He's given us to do to glorify Him and further His Kingdom.

As I said in the previous post, my failing is that I am lazy. I want to do the things that honor me and build my kingdom(like sit around and wait for people to post on my facebook wall) instead of the work that honors God and builds His Kingdom. Nothing we have belongs to us, and when we really start to understand that, I think that's when we really start honoring God with our time, talents, and money.

Thank you, Lord, for making me--for making me Your masterpiece. I thank you for reminding me that I have no right to boast--all I have is from You. I ask that You keep breathing your creativity into me that I can spread the breath of You into the work that I do. Thank you for grace. I'm ever always in need of it.