Wednesday, September 7, 2011

What Would Jesus Blog?

This blog doesn't have anything to do with Jesus. 

Okay, so technically speaking, everything has to do with Jesus, so it does.

But it really doesn't.

Or it does.

I just thought "What Would Jesus Blog?" would be a cute title.  Maybe a better title would be "What Would Jesus Do for a Klondike Bar*?" but that is borderline silly ridiculous.  Not just silly.  Not just ridiculous.  Silly ridiculous.  In a borderline sort of way.

Basically, I've been staring at my blank blogging window thingy for a few minutes, and I really just don't know how to make it unblank without blogging about something completely uninteresting.  I'd like to believe that people would read my blog even if I just typed up the ingredients on the back of my Febreeze Thai Dragon Fruit Air Freshener.  Did you know the people who make that stuff claim that it was "inspired by the winding canals of Thailand that are lined with dragon fruits, mangoes, and papayas"?  Yeah, that's what they claim.  I don't buy it.  I don't buy it because I bought it.  I bought a can of that stuff, expecting to be taken away like a bottle of Calgon, only if I sprayed this stuff on my body like Calgon, it would probably give me a rash.  Plus, I don't really want to spray it on my body, because this stuff smells nothing like Thailand--not that I'd really like to smell like Thailand, anyway. I've been to Thailand.  It smells like Thai food and washed masses.  Not unwashed masses, mind you, but the washed variety.  Asians and stupid Western tourists all lumped together, even washed, tend to not smell like a can of air freshener.

And even then the whole dragon fruit thing bugs me, because dragon fruits don't actually smell anything like actual Dragons, and I would know.

This is getting silly ridiculous.  And not just borderline, anymore.

Besides, if I did list the ingredients on this air freshener can I have here in front of me (yes, really), you wouldn't read my blog.  As much as I'd like for it to be true, I am simply NOT that awesome. 

So I'm left with my original problem.  What do I blog about?  What would Jesus blog about?  Well, that's easy.  Jesus wouldn't blog.  Jesus wouldn't blog because the interwebz hadn't been invented when he walked the earth.  Oh, okay--hypothetically speaking, Jesus would blog about....  No, I'm still gonna go with "Jesus wouldn't blog."  Should I be blogging, then?  I don't know.  I am blogging, so you can consider that some kind of Spiritual vice if you want to.

Or you can tell me what YOU would blog about.  If you had a blog, would it have a cool theme, or would you just ramble on about air freshener or ponies?  What would you like to see me blog about?  Ask me a question, if you want.  If it doesn't include mathematical equations, bright lime green, The Smurfs movie, or fried chicken, then you stand a good chance of actually getting an answer to your question.

Or not. 

*I wish I could claim credit for the brilliance of the question, "What Would Jesus Do for a Klondike Bar?" but I took it from the name of a facebook group.  It makes me giggle.

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