It's not a Sunday, Wednesday, nor Friday, yet I am blogging. I have something to say.
There's been an idea bouncing around in my head for awhile. It keeps bouncing--boing! boing! boing! I'm not ready to act on it, I don't think. I've got a lot of stuff I need to do, and I'm really sick of starting projects that I never finish. So I'm not trying to get anyone too excited about anything...yet.
But I'd like to request prayer and maybe even some preliminary thoughts on this idea that I'm thinking about. I'd like to delve a little into the scary scary world of nonfiction. The idea that's been boinging around in my head is about the role of single adults in the church.
I've jotted down a few things, but really, there are so many directions this project could go. I'm not sure if I'm ready to do much more than just let the idea bounce around some more, but I wonder if anyone has any thoughts on the subject.
I don't know how much honest literature exists out there about real-life single adults who are striving to find a place in the church. I certainly haven't seen much--if any. I'm not talking about some seventeen step program to finding the perfect godly mate, nor am I talking about a new way of doing "singles ministry." My ideas are more about bridging the supposed differences between married adults and single adults. Sometimes I get the impression that churches invent imaginary barriers between single people and married people.
Possible ways of addressing this whole topic would include discussing misconceptions some married people seem to have about single people (ie. the "call to singleness," the idea that something is wrong with single people, the idea that single people are selfish), ways that married people can realistically help single people feel more included, but mostly I'd like to honestly address singles about how they can get involved without feeling as though there has to be an active "singles ministry." Maybe there's not a great need for this, and if there isn't, then I shouldn't write about it. But I, personally, have seen some need. That's why the idea keeps bouncing around, just loudly enough so I don't forget it.
I'm asking for prayer and comments, if you have any. There are a lot of different ways this idea could bounce, and I"m trying to keep an open mind. Do you think there's a need for such a project, or has this idea been done to death? If there is a need for it, why? Are there any other things you think should be addressed, any other issues you think could be explored? Are you a single person with examples of problems/issues/etc. you would like to share about your involvement with the church or with married people? Are you a married person who has something to say about ministry and singlehood or things that you discovered after you got married? What about kids? What about single parents? What about divorced singles? Really, if this idea is going to become anything more, I know I'm going to need help. I'm going to need more experiences than just the ones bouncing around with the half-baked ideas in my head. So I would appreciate anything you have to say.
And I greatly desire your prayers for this and all of my other creative endeavors.
Showing posts with label ministry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ministry. Show all posts
Monday, September 12, 2011
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Being Intentional
My roommate was watching television, and I sat down to watch it with her. It was some kind of PBS show, and we both sometimes tend to get a little too excited about PBS shows. Do you think it's because we're awesome? I think it's because we're awesome. Anyway, this commercial came on for some sort of adventure show. And the tagline was something like, "Adventure--with a purpose!"
I squinted at the television, as I tend to squint at most things that confuse me, and I said, "Isn't the purpose of adventure simply to have an adventure?"
My roommate didn't make eye-contact with me. She wanted to avoid having a conversation with me about Narnia (apparently, she knows me well enough to know that my mind immediately went there). When I kept looking at her, she admitted, "I saw the third Narnia movie. I didn't like all the CGI." And I could tell from her tone that she really didn't want to discuss anything else about it, because I tend to get a little crazy when I talk about Narnia. But by that time, the fascinating PBS show about whales came back on, and she was saved.
Saved by the whale. Couldn't resist that pun.
But I've been thinking about purpose. Ever since college, I've been hearing the phrase, "Be intentional." I've never liked that phrase. It's not that I don't agree with it, in theory, but I don't really see that being my personal style. The "be intentional" phrase, at least in Southern Baptist circles (and even if I'm a member of a Southern Baptist church, I don't consider myself a Southern Baptist--but that's another story), is almost always used when talking about evangelism--leading people to Christ. Some people seem to have some sort of second nature that allows them to always know what to say and when and how to say it. They are able to take any conversation and naturally guide it into a conversation about Spirituality and God. These are true evangelists.
I'm not one of them.
That doesn't let me off the hook about telling people what I believe and why I believe it, all the while wanting them to believe in Jesus, too. It's just that I am not a natural evangelist. I am not a natural people-person at all. I get in moods where I need to be alone. And for a long time, I thought there was something wrong with that, because honestly, that's what society (even Southern Baptist and Christian society) tells you. But over the years I'd start to wonder if I was doing something wrong by not being intentional. Except, I've learned that when I do try to be intentional, when I try to be anything instead of just being, then I'm going to fall on my face and NOT give glory to God. That's just how it is.
I'm not talking about making an excuse for a lack of preparation. We should be prepared. Scripture is clear on that. But if I go out and try to talk to just some random person about Christ, it's not going to be natural for me. It's going to be wrong. Why? Because in my heart I know that I'm not trying to get to know that person; I'm just trying to evangelize them--get them to Jesus so I can move on. And that's not right.
There are Christians who are able to meet people where they are and almost effortlessly lead them to Christ--and they do this through love, not through some Spiritual exercise where they feel they have to get another notch in their evangelism belt. I'm sometimes tempted to be envious of them, except for these people are so genuine in their faith and love for everyone that I can't feel something as hateful as envy towards them. It would be nice to be more like them, but then I'm reminded that God doesn't make cookie-cutter people. God made one me. I'm the way I am for a reason.
I'm more of an encourager than an evangelist. I like relationships that are built on more than just getting someone to Christ--although, I do know that's the most important thing. But I'm not the sort of person who can just meet someone and say, "HEY, LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT JESUS!" I have done that before, and it did go well, but it was a special circumstance (I've been reading the Uglies series--can you tell?). I was on a mission trip to Thailand, talking to Buddhist monks, and I actually experienced that awesomeness that comes when the Holy Spirit comes upon you, and I was His witness in the uttermost parts of the earth. But that's the exception for me, not the norm. The Holy Spirit works different ways in different people, and I'm just not typically that person who gets to strike up a conversation with a complete stranger about anything--especially not something personal.
What I have learned recently is that the Lord is using me in small ways in the lives of some of my non-Christian friends. And I've found that it's a natural thing for me--not something that seems wrong at all. Why? Because I love these friends. When difficult circumstances arise in their lives, it gives me an opportunity to naturally tell them about Jesus. It allows me to tell them that I am praying for them, and to encourage them Scripturally--to reinforce that I have hope in my struggles because of Christ. It's not about evangelism at that point--it's about love.
It's not that I'm against having a purpose or that I'm against being intentional. I'm just not that person. There are amazing godly people who are those people. I'm more of the sort of person who sees the importance of the journey. Friendships are important whether they're with Christians or nonChristians, and I don't think the main point of those friendships should be just to get them to Christ as soon as possible. It's not always a copout to say that actions speak louder than words. Sometimes I'm going to be much more of an effective evangelist by quietly showing who Christ is and who I am in Him, only speaking when it's natural to do so.
At the same time, I am not comfortable being too comfortable. So I'm doing a few purposeful things that kind of scare me a little bit. I've joined a running group with my church--well, it's actually a multi-sport group, but running is one of the main components. The goal of the group is to encourage one another while also trying to build relationships with other runners, in the hopes of sharing Christ. And even though I'm not a group sort of person or an intentional sort of person, I really just can't ignore the fact that I've just started running fairly recently, right as this group is starting out (Let me pause right here and laugh hysterically at the thought that I, Ruth Campbell, am in a SPORTS MINISTRY. That's hilarious. It really is. God has a great sense of humor). And last night I went and ran with them. A lot of it was just me running by myself (which is how I prefer it, and I liked the fact that they let me do that), but I was still part of a group--a group with a purpose in mind.
So we'll see how things continue to go. I think I'm ready for some adventure.
I squinted at the television, as I tend to squint at most things that confuse me, and I said, "Isn't the purpose of adventure simply to have an adventure?"
My roommate didn't make eye-contact with me. She wanted to avoid having a conversation with me about Narnia (apparently, she knows me well enough to know that my mind immediately went there). When I kept looking at her, she admitted, "I saw the third Narnia movie. I didn't like all the CGI." And I could tell from her tone that she really didn't want to discuss anything else about it, because I tend to get a little crazy when I talk about Narnia. But by that time, the fascinating PBS show about whales came back on, and she was saved.
Saved by the whale. Couldn't resist that pun.
But I've been thinking about purpose. Ever since college, I've been hearing the phrase, "Be intentional." I've never liked that phrase. It's not that I don't agree with it, in theory, but I don't really see that being my personal style. The "be intentional" phrase, at least in Southern Baptist circles (and even if I'm a member of a Southern Baptist church, I don't consider myself a Southern Baptist--but that's another story), is almost always used when talking about evangelism--leading people to Christ. Some people seem to have some sort of second nature that allows them to always know what to say and when and how to say it. They are able to take any conversation and naturally guide it into a conversation about Spirituality and God. These are true evangelists.
I'm not one of them.
That doesn't let me off the hook about telling people what I believe and why I believe it, all the while wanting them to believe in Jesus, too. It's just that I am not a natural evangelist. I am not a natural people-person at all. I get in moods where I need to be alone. And for a long time, I thought there was something wrong with that, because honestly, that's what society (even Southern Baptist and Christian society) tells you. But over the years I'd start to wonder if I was doing something wrong by not being intentional. Except, I've learned that when I do try to be intentional, when I try to be anything instead of just being, then I'm going to fall on my face and NOT give glory to God. That's just how it is.
I'm not talking about making an excuse for a lack of preparation. We should be prepared. Scripture is clear on that. But if I go out and try to talk to just some random person about Christ, it's not going to be natural for me. It's going to be wrong. Why? Because in my heart I know that I'm not trying to get to know that person; I'm just trying to evangelize them--get them to Jesus so I can move on. And that's not right.
There are Christians who are able to meet people where they are and almost effortlessly lead them to Christ--and they do this through love, not through some Spiritual exercise where they feel they have to get another notch in their evangelism belt. I'm sometimes tempted to be envious of them, except for these people are so genuine in their faith and love for everyone that I can't feel something as hateful as envy towards them. It would be nice to be more like them, but then I'm reminded that God doesn't make cookie-cutter people. God made one me. I'm the way I am for a reason.
I'm more of an encourager than an evangelist. I like relationships that are built on more than just getting someone to Christ--although, I do know that's the most important thing. But I'm not the sort of person who can just meet someone and say, "HEY, LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT JESUS!" I have done that before, and it did go well, but it was a special circumstance (I've been reading the Uglies series--can you tell?). I was on a mission trip to Thailand, talking to Buddhist monks, and I actually experienced that awesomeness that comes when the Holy Spirit comes upon you, and I was His witness in the uttermost parts of the earth. But that's the exception for me, not the norm. The Holy Spirit works different ways in different people, and I'm just not typically that person who gets to strike up a conversation with a complete stranger about anything--especially not something personal.
What I have learned recently is that the Lord is using me in small ways in the lives of some of my non-Christian friends. And I've found that it's a natural thing for me--not something that seems wrong at all. Why? Because I love these friends. When difficult circumstances arise in their lives, it gives me an opportunity to naturally tell them about Jesus. It allows me to tell them that I am praying for them, and to encourage them Scripturally--to reinforce that I have hope in my struggles because of Christ. It's not about evangelism at that point--it's about love.
It's not that I'm against having a purpose or that I'm against being intentional. I'm just not that person. There are amazing godly people who are those people. I'm more of the sort of person who sees the importance of the journey. Friendships are important whether they're with Christians or nonChristians, and I don't think the main point of those friendships should be just to get them to Christ as soon as possible. It's not always a copout to say that actions speak louder than words. Sometimes I'm going to be much more of an effective evangelist by quietly showing who Christ is and who I am in Him, only speaking when it's natural to do so.
At the same time, I am not comfortable being too comfortable. So I'm doing a few purposeful things that kind of scare me a little bit. I've joined a running group with my church--well, it's actually a multi-sport group, but running is one of the main components. The goal of the group is to encourage one another while also trying to build relationships with other runners, in the hopes of sharing Christ. And even though I'm not a group sort of person or an intentional sort of person, I really just can't ignore the fact that I've just started running fairly recently, right as this group is starting out (Let me pause right here and laugh hysterically at the thought that I, Ruth Campbell, am in a SPORTS MINISTRY. That's hilarious. It really is. God has a great sense of humor). And last night I went and ran with them. A lot of it was just me running by myself (which is how I prefer it, and I liked the fact that they let me do that), but I was still part of a group--a group with a purpose in mind.
So we'll see how things continue to go. I think I'm ready for some adventure.
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Sunday Update: Old Skool Amy Grant was Right
I worked a lot this week. Just sayin'. It's also been a hugely emotional week. I don't want to go into it here because it's not my story to tell, but I will say that it's always hard seeing old friends because of sad circumstances. I'll also say that life is precious, and if God's given life to me and you, it's a pretty sure thing that He wants us to live it. It's just hard sometimes getting that head knowledge into my heart.
When I see old friends, all of which who are a few years younger than I am, it's hard to see them as adults. But they are adults...and believe it or not, so am I. Most of my old friends are married. Most of them have real jobs. Some of them have kids. It's easy to start playing the comparison game so I can feel guilty about what I haven't accomplished that I think I'm supposed to have accomplished. It's also easy to fall into the trap of comparing myself to those who seem to have it less together than I do. Up front I'm all smiles, but in my head I can be thinking, "I may not have a real job, but at least I'm not like so and so...."
Such thinking is judgemental. Such thinking is prideful. Such thinking is also a distraction from the truth. And if I'm honest with myself, then I have to admit that I've been playing this kind of game for most of my life. And it's successfully distracted me from the truth time and time again.
When I was a freshman in college, I compared myself to all the other Biblical studies majors. I knew I didn't want to be a missionary. I knew I didn't want to be a pastor (it wasn't allowed there anyway because I'm a girl). I did want to be a pastor's wife back in the day, but even then I knew it was unlikely to happen because I was never quite the pastor's wife type. I didn't fit in with the Biblical studies people. They all had this language and lingo that I didn't speak. And I let Satan fool me for a little while. I let him trick me into believing that I couldn't do ministry if I wasn't like everyone else.
And it's weird how this happened. I found a really old cassette tape. Do you know what those are? The six year old I currently watch didn't know what a cassette tape was. She saw one in my car's tape deck (I leave my "The King and I" soundtrack in there at all times, partly because I occasionally want to hear the dulcet tones of Yul Brenner, and partly because it's like the only cassette tape I still own) and said, "WHAT'S THAT?" I said, "It's a cassette tape." She continued to stare at it in wonder. "What does it DO?" I said, "It plays music. It's what I listened to when I was a little girl before cds and mp3 players came out." She wanted me to demonstrate, so I popped the tape in. "Shall We Dance" blasted on my car's speakers. She said, "I don't like this song. (ME: WHAT? HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE THAT SONG!?) Skip to the next one." I said, "I can't skip it. We'll have to wait for it to fast forward." She was dumbfounded.
Anyway, when I was an insecure 18 year old college freshman, as opposed to the insecure 31 year old wanna be author that I am now, I found this old Amy Grant cassette tape. That's right. Amy Grant: The Collection. When I was like 8 years old, I used to do a pretend musical to this tape. I rocked my own socks off, let me tell you. Of course, now if I heard it, I'd start screaming in agony about how she totally screwed up "Sing Your Praise to the Lord" by Rich Mullins--but at that time my musical taste was pretty much geared towards whatever tapes or cds my sister bought. Since she didn't like Rich Mullins, I didn't know who the guy was.
When I found the tape as an 18 year old, I just put it in for kicks. And I heard that old song, "All I Ever Have to Be." I'll just go ahead and post the lyrics, just for your Classic Contemporary Christian enjoyment:
When the weight of all my dreams
Is resting heavy on my head,
And the thoughtful words of health and hope
Have all been nicely said.
But I'm still hurting,
Wondering if I'll ever be
The one I think I am.
I think I am.
Then you gently re-remind me
That you've made me from the first,
And the more I try to be the best
The more I get the worst.
And I realize the good in me,
Is only there because of who you are.
Who you are...
And all I ever have to be
Is what you've made me.
Any more or less would be a step
Out of your plan.
As you daily recreate me,
Help me always keep in mind
That I only have to do
What I can find.
And all I ever have to be
All I have to be
All I ever have to be
Is what you've made me.
When I was 18 years old, this song was a reminder to me that I don't have to be like everyone else. It was a reminder to me that God made me the way He made me because He had a plan for me that was different than what He had for anyone else--He had a way He wanted to minister through me that wasn't like the way He wanted to minister through others. So I couldn't fairly compare myself to anyone. And if I tried to be like someone else, that would be a loss.
Now, all these years later, it's still a reminder to me. It's a reminder to me that I don't have to compare myself to anyone. This doesn't give me an excuse to be lazy. This doesn't give me an excuse not to try. What it does, though, is give me freedom from the silly games I play--trying to compete for a prize that none of us are going to win. It doesn't matter if I never achieve anything lofty. If I never get married or never have kids, or if I never hook a literary agent, or if I never finish that cd I hoped to finish, or if I just stay in childcare forever and ever and ever--it doesn't matter. If I do accomplish those great things and more--it still doesn't matter. There's always going to be someone who seems to have things better than I do. And there's really no reason to compare myself to them.
Because God only made one me. God only made one you. Role models are fine, but in the grand scheme of things, the only person any of us has to be is the person that God made. And the pressure is off us, anyway, because God is the only one who's worthy. We're just worthy because of His worth--because He is worthy and because He wants us. But, thankfully, that's a pretty big deal.
When I see old friends, all of which who are a few years younger than I am, it's hard to see them as adults. But they are adults...and believe it or not, so am I. Most of my old friends are married. Most of them have real jobs. Some of them have kids. It's easy to start playing the comparison game so I can feel guilty about what I haven't accomplished that I think I'm supposed to have accomplished. It's also easy to fall into the trap of comparing myself to those who seem to have it less together than I do. Up front I'm all smiles, but in my head I can be thinking, "I may not have a real job, but at least I'm not like so and so...."
Such thinking is judgemental. Such thinking is prideful. Such thinking is also a distraction from the truth. And if I'm honest with myself, then I have to admit that I've been playing this kind of game for most of my life. And it's successfully distracted me from the truth time and time again.
When I was a freshman in college, I compared myself to all the other Biblical studies majors. I knew I didn't want to be a missionary. I knew I didn't want to be a pastor (it wasn't allowed there anyway because I'm a girl). I did want to be a pastor's wife back in the day, but even then I knew it was unlikely to happen because I was never quite the pastor's wife type. I didn't fit in with the Biblical studies people. They all had this language and lingo that I didn't speak. And I let Satan fool me for a little while. I let him trick me into believing that I couldn't do ministry if I wasn't like everyone else.
And it's weird how this happened. I found a really old cassette tape. Do you know what those are? The six year old I currently watch didn't know what a cassette tape was. She saw one in my car's tape deck (I leave my "The King and I" soundtrack in there at all times, partly because I occasionally want to hear the dulcet tones of Yul Brenner, and partly because it's like the only cassette tape I still own) and said, "WHAT'S THAT?" I said, "It's a cassette tape." She continued to stare at it in wonder. "What does it DO?" I said, "It plays music. It's what I listened to when I was a little girl before cds and mp3 players came out." She wanted me to demonstrate, so I popped the tape in. "Shall We Dance" blasted on my car's speakers. She said, "I don't like this song. (ME: WHAT? HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE THAT SONG!?) Skip to the next one." I said, "I can't skip it. We'll have to wait for it to fast forward." She was dumbfounded.
Anyway, when I was an insecure 18 year old college freshman, as opposed to the insecure 31 year old wanna be author that I am now, I found this old Amy Grant cassette tape. That's right. Amy Grant: The Collection. When I was like 8 years old, I used to do a pretend musical to this tape. I rocked my own socks off, let me tell you. Of course, now if I heard it, I'd start screaming in agony about how she totally screwed up "Sing Your Praise to the Lord" by Rich Mullins--but at that time my musical taste was pretty much geared towards whatever tapes or cds my sister bought. Since she didn't like Rich Mullins, I didn't know who the guy was.
When I found the tape as an 18 year old, I just put it in for kicks. And I heard that old song, "All I Ever Have to Be." I'll just go ahead and post the lyrics, just for your Classic Contemporary Christian enjoyment:
When the weight of all my dreams
Is resting heavy on my head,
And the thoughtful words of health and hope
Have all been nicely said.
But I'm still hurting,
Wondering if I'll ever be
The one I think I am.
I think I am.
Then you gently re-remind me
That you've made me from the first,
And the more I try to be the best
The more I get the worst.
And I realize the good in me,
Is only there because of who you are.
Who you are...
And all I ever have to be
Is what you've made me.
Any more or less would be a step
Out of your plan.
As you daily recreate me,
Help me always keep in mind
That I only have to do
What I can find.
And all I ever have to be
All I have to be
All I ever have to be
Is what you've made me.
When I was 18 years old, this song was a reminder to me that I don't have to be like everyone else. It was a reminder to me that God made me the way He made me because He had a plan for me that was different than what He had for anyone else--He had a way He wanted to minister through me that wasn't like the way He wanted to minister through others. So I couldn't fairly compare myself to anyone. And if I tried to be like someone else, that would be a loss.
Now, all these years later, it's still a reminder to me. It's a reminder to me that I don't have to compare myself to anyone. This doesn't give me an excuse to be lazy. This doesn't give me an excuse not to try. What it does, though, is give me freedom from the silly games I play--trying to compete for a prize that none of us are going to win. It doesn't matter if I never achieve anything lofty. If I never get married or never have kids, or if I never hook a literary agent, or if I never finish that cd I hoped to finish, or if I just stay in childcare forever and ever and ever--it doesn't matter. If I do accomplish those great things and more--it still doesn't matter. There's always going to be someone who seems to have things better than I do. And there's really no reason to compare myself to them.
Because God only made one me. God only made one you. Role models are fine, but in the grand scheme of things, the only person any of us has to be is the person that God made. And the pressure is off us, anyway, because God is the only one who's worthy. We're just worthy because of His worth--because He is worthy and because He wants us. But, thankfully, that's a pretty big deal.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)